Anelka On Way Home

All together now – Coming home, he’s coming home…

Nic’s been chucked out of the French squad and sent home in disgrace.

Pardon me if I don’t weep into my baguette. Excusez-moi if I don’t join the general hue and cry about his foul-mouthed tirade.

While I am sorry for the man on a personal level that he has missed out on some World Cup appearances, this has been tempered by three more salient, and in my opinion more important issues.

First. There is obviously a problem within the French camp which has had a direct effect on their performances and led to their elimination from the tournament.

Problem? Their situation cannot be described as just a “problem” surely? England have a “problem”. Italy usually begin tournaments as if they have a “problem”. The words Disaster and Catastrophe are more appropriate.

France have players playing like they’d never met before, substitutes who physically distance themselves from the coach and that same coach who, for the past few seasons, appears intent on tearing the heart out of a team that should be feared, not ridiculed.

I won’t mention how they cheated their way to qualification. Would you want to be tarred with the same brush as Thierry Henry? Nic, you’re better off out of it mate.

Second. The foul-mouthed tirade? Son of a whore is very reminiscent of the Zidane farce isn’t it? So, let’s look at this logically.

Reserved, a little shy, but always honest is how Anelka has been described, by none other than King Carlo. Keeps himself to himself.

So is his foul-mouthed outburst consistent with what we know of him? No, of course not. Outburst, maybe. Foul-mouthed, extremely unlikely. More Jackanory from the press most likely.

And now he’s denied that what is reported is what he said.

Someone within the French camp is lying to the press. Evra himself has said that there is a traitor in their midst; and that Anelka really did say those things. And we all remember how honest a man Patrice Evra is, don’t we? (Evra insisted he didn’t physically attack anyone and anyway Chelsea’s groundsman spoke to him in a racist way. The FA Commission found both to be false.

Take a look here there’s also a link to the full report on that page.) Would you really want to be part of that? Nic, you’re better off out of it mate.

Finally, consider the side to face West Brom next season. Carlo has said that players who progress in the World Cup will not be expected to come straight back into the team as soon as the season starts. Be fair, they have families, they need a break and the club don’t want players going stale half way through the season.

So, who do we start with? Now that’s a whole new article, a new world of debate. But – very quickly – goalkeeper and midfield are sorted. With France deservedly out, poor old Florent Malouda can forget his nightmare and return home too. (He at least had the pleasure of scoring 100% of the French goals, ie one. Mind you, it was a good goal, not a handball in sight!)

We’ll miss Lamps of course, but for a game or two we’ll cope (I’m assuming England progress here of course, which may make me look a fool, but I’ll take a chance!). The defence still looks a bit iffy, though, with major players progressing in the WC, and so the return of Anelka will be a godsend up front. Pace, strength, skill and experience. We need him to be part of that team, don’t we? Nic, you’re better off in it, mate, welcome back.

Welcome back to a coach that trusts you, a team that values you, a fanbase that loves you and a club that needs you.

All together now….