In The News: Carvalho, Ozil & Madness

Some of us thought the omission of Ricardo Carvalho from the Community Shield was odd, considering his fitness and previous appearances, and sadly the reason for that is now clear.

A fee of €8 million has been agreed with Real Madrid to instigate the transfer of our Portuguese defender, and re-unite him a third time with mentor, Jose Mourinho.

Last season wasn’t one to remember for Carvalho as injury largely disrupted his playing time and led to Alex playing alongside Terry for much of the campaign. With Ivanovic also able to play centrally, and age obviously a concern, this is a transfer that suits all parties well.

Mourinho will inherit a player he knows, one who’s quality is not in question, and whose pace now may be more suited to the Spanish league. Chelsea will lessen the average age of the squad, reduce the wage bill further after the departures of Ballack, Cole, Belletti and Deco, and also free up a position in the squad for a young defender, possibly Bruma.

We would like to thank Ricardo for his time at Chelsea, for helping us to win the trophies we won, for never complaining and just getting on with it, and for looking like Lord Percy from Blackadder, which amused me if no one else.

So from departures to arrivals, or possible arrivals depending on how cynical you are about football media, officials, agents and the like. Werder Bremen director of sport Klaus Allofs has spoken today about Mesut Özil, and confirmed that; “It is possible that there is now a bit of movement in the issue.” Before adding; “I am not running backwards and forwards to the fax machine or getting sweaty palms when I check my emails to see if maybe an offer has arrived.”

Somehow despite very strong rumours of a move to Barcelona already being sealed, and including the fact there’s no mention of either United or Chelsea by Allofs, and this being reported next to nowhere else other than in the UK at all, make of it what you will.

Finally we finish with madness, no not the 80’s ska band, but two very clear cases of what I believe is a new phenomenon, and one that we here at will certainly be keeping an eye out for in recent weeks. We’ve had mad cow disease, now we’ve ‘Mental Pro Syndrome (MPS)’.

Our first patient goes by the name of Gerrard. He displayed clear signs of MPS today with two complete gems. Clearly trying to talk up Chelsea old boy Joey Cole, we think Stevie lost all sense perspective when he claimed; “Messi can do some amazing things, but anything he can do Joe can do as well, if not better. He used to shock us in training by doing footy tricks with a golf ball that most players can’t even do with a football. I really fancy Joe for the player of the year award this season.”

Clearly comparing Joe Cole to Messi is like…. er comparing Joe Cole to Messi! Which as almost anyone who saw him play, when he did play last season, will say he was more of a mess, than Messi. Gerrard’s symptoms then worsened, and when asked about England supporters booing he said; “I probably would boo as well. We deserve it. The important thing is that the supporters don’t drag these young fresh faces into the booing. It is important they give it to the players who went to the World Cup.”

The second professional to be struck down with this emerging disease is QPR boss, Neil Warnock. Talking up defender Fitz Hall, Warnock said; “At the back, that’s the best I’ve seen of Fitz Hall since I’ve been at the club, I hope that by Christmas we get big offers for him from the Premier League because I look at the centre halves around and you can’t tell me that the centre halves that went to the World Cup are better than Fitz Hall.”

Yes we can, Neil. Don’t worry, we’re sending a doctor.

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