Chelsea Carols

At this festive time of year, may I present to you….a Football Service of Carols & Songs.

The Chels’s Carol

God rest ye merry Chelsea fans
Let nothing you dismay
Cos AVB our saviour
Has found a perfect way
To save us all from player- power
When we were gone astray
And we all still really hate Chris Foy
Hate Chris Foy
We all still really hate Chris Foy

Arsenal’s Carol

Silent night, Arsenal’s quiet.
Emirates stadium’s nice and bright
Comfy chairs, but no silverware
Atmosphere’s stiff as Arsene’s hair
Fans stretch out in their se-ats
And sleep in heavenly peace

Tottenham’s Carol

O little club of Tottenham
How still we see thee lie!
Meanwhile out on the High Road
The rioters go by;
They smashed the ticket office in
But left the tickets there
They’d rather burgle JD Sports
Than watch Spuds anywhere

A QPR Carol

We three kings of Chelsea are
One in a taxi, one in a car
One on a scooter, beeping his hooter
Laughing at QPR.

O your ground’s a dump
Your players thick
£50 tickets, you’re taking the mick
Your boss is mad, your fans are sad
Back in the Championship in a tick

A Jolly Song for Fergie

Fergie the Red-nosed Manager
Had a very shiny nose
And if you ever saw it
You would even say it glows
All of the other managers used to laugh
And call him names
They always hoped poor Fergie
Would lose all his football games
Then one foggy Christmas Eve
Rooney came to say
“Fergie with your nose so bright
Won’t you light my tree tonight?”
So all the Rooneys loved him
And they shouted out with glee
Fergie the Red-nosed manager
You’ll go down in history.

Scouseaid Carol (Trad.)

Feed the Scousers
Let them know it’s Christmas time

(repeat till bored)

Zola’s Carol (Trad.)

Away at Old Trafford
No win for the reds
The little lord Zola
Stuck out his left peg
He dinked to the right side
He dinked to the left
And lobbed big nose Schmeichel
And left him for dead.

I’ll be back in the new year with all the build-up to and fall-out from the CPO AGM. In the meantime, have yourselves a Merry Chelsea Christmas!

Follow me on Twitter @BlueBaby67.